A Bittersweet Day at the Archives

On Tuesday, I went to the courthouse to volunteer at the Bedford County Archives.

To provide context for the rest of the post, I will share the following...

Over the years, my grandmother and grandfather volunteered at the Bedford County Archives. The "vault" where many of the original books are housed has been named in their honor. They were strong advocates for preserving records and history of the county. My grandmother painstakingly indexed many of the record books housed there.

I have digital versions of many of those indexes and have been working to create a master spreadsheet of those names and page numbers so that it would be easy to do a search for names in the records.

I was working with Carol Roberts, archivist on matching up the file names of the digital files I have with the printed lists in the books to determine which ones might be missing. Some of the early ones were done on a typewriter and were never entered into a computer.

We got to one of the books and inside was a yellow legal pad. Carol handed it to me and asked if I recognized the writing. I did. It was an index my grandmother had started and never finished....

I lost my grandmother in November of 2017. Seeing this yellow paper with her distinctive handwriting on it shook me to the core. I had a rough time the rest of the day.

Ever since I moved into my grandparents house, I have seen a male and female cardinal feeding regularly outside my front window.

That afternoon when I got home, I sat down and just looked out the window. I was still shaken by the experience from earlier. Not long after that, the female cardinal landed on the banister outside the window and looked in while turning its head as if were looking for me. I guess that was my grandmother letting me know it would be okay and that she was watching over me.

Isn't it odd how the simplest of things can bring back such a flood of memories and emotions?

I love volunteering in the archives just like she did for many years. Every time I go in the vault, it has a distinct smell of old papers, dust and who knows what else! It reminds me of my grandparents. I wish I could bottle that smell for days when I am missing them. For some reason, it gives me peace.

I miss my grandparents every. single. day. But...I know they are watching over me and are proud that I have continued in their footsteps.